Posts
How many times does Ryan Seacrest have to plug the amazing talent pool of American Idol? It was so amazing that they cut 100 people from the Hollywood round last night.
I think I found the real key to what they mean by "talent." Here's how it works:
The contestant must dress as either a.) a complete nerd; b.) a utter freak; or c.) a total tramp. That way, when he or she (sometimes it's unclear which) gets up on stage, you form an allegedly misrepresented opinion of them based on the way they look. So, when they open their mouth to sing, it doesn't really matter what they sound like. Because either way, you'll think to yourself (or mutter aloud continuously throughout the program to the irritation of your companions), "Huh. They're actually not that bad."
So, next time you're dressing for a job interview, decide on one of the aforementioned guises (I'd recommend a or c). Hey, it works in Hollywood. Consider yourself on the cutting edge. And if it doesn’t work, you can always sue for ageism, racism, or looksism.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Oh, the humanity
Oh Lord. "ET" has hit an all-time low. The low began with Larry Birkhead being declared the father of 'lil Dannilynn. Actually, now that I think about it, that was the high point. The steady decline really started when ET formed it's pact with Satan and Larry to follow the baby's every "first." First teeth, first birthday party and now....the bottom: her first visit to, and I (more or less) quote, "the grave of the mother who she will never know."
Really? I can hardly wait to see what's next. Maybe in year two, they can reenact how exactly it was that her mother died. This, of course, will be because they will be helping her either: a.) cope; b.) learn more about "the mother she will never know"; or c.) it's sweeps week for NBC.
My parents had a baby book of my firsts. I wonder what Dannilynn will think when she's in her twenties, and looks back on the freaky video diary her father created for her. If ET's still around, they better be ready to cough up some cash for therapy.
Really? I can hardly wait to see what's next. Maybe in year two, they can reenact how exactly it was that her mother died. This, of course, will be because they will be helping her either: a.) cope; b.) learn more about "the mother she will never know"; or c.) it's sweeps week for NBC.
My parents had a baby book of my firsts. I wonder what Dannilynn will think when she's in her twenties, and looks back on the freaky video diary her father created for her. If ET's still around, they better be ready to cough up some cash for therapy.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)